Nobody is Perfect: A Theory Pioneered by Hannahs by Hannah

Nobody is Perfect: A Theory Pioneered by Hannahs by Hannah - September 2022 Scholarship Essay

I think about my past self often. How excited I was to learn multiplication because addition and subtraction were too elementary. How devoted I was to girl scouts and my cookie selling tactics. How long I practiced juggling my soccer ball until I beat my previous record. I think about how hard I was on myself. I had to be the best. I had to get a perfect score on the test. I had to outsell my entire troop and receive the very special cookie award. I had to excel on the soccer field. I had to be perfect. If I could meet my younger self, I would tell her very plainly that perfection is unattainable. You can not be the best at everything and that is okay. In the wise words of a fellow Hannah (surname: Montana), “Nobody is perfect.”

I vividly remember my first B. It was on a quiz in my 7th grade Pre-Algebra Honors class. The teacher was only as tall as middle school me, wearing a black and white striped dress. I remember her handing back papers to each student. If your paper was face-up it meant you got a 100%. Perfect. That was the goal. She reached my desk, licked her pointer finger, separated my quiz from the pile in her hand and placed it face-down. FACE. DOWN. That meant imperfection. In other words, I failed. I was embarrassed. On one hand, I did not want my peers to see that my paper was face-down. On the other hand, I did not want them to see the score I received. I didn't even want to see the score I received!

Finally, I gained the courage to flip the right corner of the paper over just enough to read “89%” in red pen. I had never stuffed anything into my backpack with such intensity. I didn't even bother to put it nicely in my math folder. What was the point? I might as well drop out of the class. Switch to regular pre-algebra. Or better yet, drop out of school. I’m not lying - the thought did cross my mind.

I know I sound dramatic. I was very much so. Since that awful, awful day, I have received several more Bs and other grades I would rather not blatantly state. I know Hannah says “you live and you learn it” but I simply wish I knew then that an 89% was an amazing score. That a 79% or a 69% would have been just as great. Because I am not defined by one test score. Or any test scores for that matter. My personhood transcends all exam percentiles, girl scout cookie selling competitions, and soccer juggling records. My humanity comes first.

As I begin my senior year and apply to institutions of higher education, I understand that doing my best is far more important than getting an A. Instead of learning to pass an exam, I want to learn for the sake of learning. I want to be the sponge that younger-me was. As much as I have grown since childhood, I still admire my past self. She wanted to do the best because she thought that was the only way to measure success. She was strong and determined. In that sense, she is just like me.