NC by Mary

NC by Mary - December 2016 Scholarship Essay

My mother often reminds me of a story from when I was only 4 and I asked her permission to go give a hug to an elderly man struggling in the cereal aisle. Even as a little girl my love for others (especially the elderly) was something that defined me. So, it only seemed logical that when my mother became a hospice nurse I would grab this opportunity and run with it. I filled out forms, took tests, and even received a TB test. For eleven year old Mary, needles in my arm meant I really wanted this. So there I was, an official hospice volunteer. I accompanied my Mother to her appointments, singing to the patients, wiping tears from their faces, and even reading to them occasionally. I felt at home with these people. One day however, everything changed.
My mom came home from work one evening talking about a new patient named Betty. So naturally, I went to meet her. She had big blue eyes and hair that challenged the snow. She wore floor length, zip up robes, and fuzzy socks. She walked a little hunched over and always smelt of peppermint patties and sweat, but I didn’t mind. From the moment Betty and I shared our first hug I felt more at ease than I ever have. That first visit we sat outside on her back patio and talked until our stomachs were grumbling for food.
We became the very best of friends, and she had so much wisdom to share. Betty taught me a lot about loving others and never letting circumstances get the better of you. She would tell me, “You can have whatever you want, but never make the mistake of thinking you're just going to get it.” Betty never let me act entitled. If even for a moment little twelve year old Mary would act as if she deserved something, Betty would remind me hard work is the only path to whatever I wanted.
We spent a lot of time together, from watching tennis in the afternoons to sharing slushies and stories on her living room couch. I would help her clean, walk to the restroom and even make baloney sandwiches for us to share. I have such wonderful memories of us giggling about the most random things, like whether the coke cans in her refrigerator or the York candies in her cabinet were older. I loved being her volunteer, but I could never forget that Betty was in a hospice program and had progressing cancer. So of course, as time went on, her health deteriorated and so did the amount of things she could accomplish. Betty needed my mother and I more and more as time went on. Then, she began to fall. Both mine and Betty's family worried for her safety.
There is one night I will forever have imprinted in my mind. I was sitting at Betty’s feet, my head upon her robe clad lap, and her bony fingers playing with my hair. She was talking to my parents about moving into an assisted living home. But Betty’s only wish was to die in her own home. As they were talking, a moment of silence swept over the room. Betty came close to my ear and whispered the words i knew so well from our goodbyes, “A bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck.” and she kissed my head. Betty passed away just one week later, in her home. Her wish had come true. Although my heart broke knowing my Betty was gone, I was put at ease knowing I will carry her wisdom and love with me throughout my journeys. Betty was a special kind of woman that taught me love is all that matters. One very important lesson I took from my time with Betty is that everyone needs a bushel and a peck sometimes.