Self taught “Enriched Studies” by Nayeli

Self taught “Enriched Studies” by Nayeli - July 2023 Scholarship Essay

You know that if everyone is fighting to be on top, it could either rub on you, or drop you to the very bottom. Whether it's a physical or academic fight, I do think that your environment plays a big role in expectations. I would've never expected that my journey would have turned out the way it did. I think the old me would have expected me to attend an Ivy League. To be filthy rich. And probably be associated with white people. But who I am today, involved having to teach myself the “enriched studies” portion. This was all because of my high school experience at Los Angeles Studies for Enriched Studies, aka LACES. What does that even mean? It meant that although it was an atmosphere enriched in academics, I had to overcome pressure, the feeling out of place, and the toxic expectations of being perfect.

I've been at LACES for 7 years. I've taken the bus from Cudahy to the heart of Los Angeles everyday. Meaning the bus ride was an hour and 30 minutes. Those long years were coming to an end with college right around the corner. The old me had an expectation. A toxic one. I had an expectation that I was going to get into the most competitive schools. However, back then I didn't realize that I was in a competitive school. Just because I went to LACES didn't mean that I had an automatic spot in top schools. If you were going to a Community College or even State school, you were expected to be nobody here. Why? Because, almost everyone was going to a top school. Everyone has fought to the top since 6th grade. If you were proud of being valedictorian, well you weren’t so special in a pool of 96 other valedictorians. It was as if everyone was judged based on academics.

My world stopped when I got rejected from my top schools. To me it meant that all the hard work, the long bus rides and the loads of school work were for nothing. Was I not a smart Hispanic that everyone labeled me as? And to be honest, I was frustrated. I was mad at LACES. How the heck did that “enriched studies” not benefit me. However, I had to go through this period of realization. I learned a different “enrichment” experience. I don't expect you to feel sorry for me because I know that this is a universal experience. People get rejected left to right afterall. But instead I want to share the value of this inability to meet expectations in this environment I was meant to be in. It was a huge wake up call. I was enriched in a way where I valued the ability to work hard through this competitive school. My initial expectations were very superficial. I can’t believe I overlooked the enormous support I had from my family. After reflecting on my rejection now that it's been a couple months, my mindset has changed so much. I realize that if I would have never gone through that rejection, I would have never gotten close to my mom again. I would have never had a close connection with my Spanish teacher. I valued the way that I always pushed myself to be better. To never give up. And with this, I committed to Long Beach. I researched programs. I got accepted into the Honors program. As well as the XP Beach program for my Pre Health Administration major. Just because my expectation was let down, it didn't mean that I couldn't proceed into my next chapter in college. My new perspective was that I should expect to fail. I should expect rejections. I should be uncomfortable. These words tend to be associated with negativity, but they shouldn't be feared. Because, without falling down, there won't be any enrichment of new experiences. You must face rejection in order to value what you do have in life. And you can only feel rich, with life paying you with these lessons.