YOLO by Pearl

YOLO by Pearl - September 2022 Scholarship Essay

Everyone is embarrassed of their middle school selves; going through a phase of bad fashion choices and even worse behavioral decisions is basically a rite of passage for high school at this point. I'll admit, I vividly remember wearing a green school spirit hoodie with orange leggings and red shoes and calling it a fashion statement. But even if I am thoroughly humiliated by my lack of understanding of the rudimentary colors in middle school, I would never tell my middle school self to read a fashion magazine or two. Trust me, it's better that I made unflattering clothing choices in middle school than in high school. Instead, I would probably have a chat with my younger self about my attitude.
In middle school, I was the definition of a try-hard. If you looked that word up in a dictionary, I swear, my eight grade yearbook picture would be there, in all its cheesy smile and neon glasses glory. I joined Speech and Student Council because the latest "10 Things the Ivies Want to See on Your Resume!" article told me to. I took every advanced class my school had and sucked up to teachers like no one else. I had friends, but they were equally competitive and we inched around each other in a constant competition of passive aggressive comments about grades. Over the course of three years, I went to three sleepovers, two birthday parties, and took one day off of school. You're probably judging me right now; what kind of thirteen year old skips hanging out with friends to study for a test that won't even show up on her college resume? The answer is, not the healthy kind.
If there is anything I could drill into my middle school self's head, it would be that You Only Live Once. A little cliche, I know, but I desperately needed to hear that back then. I have made so many wonderful memories with my family and my friends in high school because I was able to let go of my incessant need to be the best. There's a special kind of joy that comes with time well spent with your loved ones, and that's a feeling I want to share with my younger self. If I had pulled myself out of my room's mountain of geometry textbooks and literature summer homework earlier, I could be focusing on my ugly color combinations from that time of my life, rather than cringing at my unhealthy lifestyle and toxic reclusiveness. No academic achievement can make up for a meaningful dinner with family or a lighthearted movie night with friends. And if my past self could learn that, I'm sure I could look back at middle school with no regrets.