F.A.I.L: First Attempt in Learning by Emma

F.A.I.L: First Attempt in Learning by Emma - January 2025 Scholarship Essay

Everyone has that one teacher that changed their life. As a result, there is no doubt that these people are not “accidentally” placed in our lives because without them, we would not be the people we are today. For me, Mrs. Annette Philips, my elementary school math teacher, was the teacher that gave my life a new perspective.
Before entering her classroom in 3rd grade, I did not accept failure. To me, failing was an indicator that I was good for nothing. However, after being in her class for a few days, I unofficially declared myself as the dumbest student in the class because of my slowness to learning, in comparison to my peers. I was fully convinced that I was never going to be like the other students because I always failed. For example, I could not solve the open-ended questions on my own, find the relationship between the numbers on the board, and understand the concepts the first time. I was certain that there will be a day when Mrs. Philips will pull me aside and tell me I could no longer be in her class. I was almost anticipating it.
I remember she had a handwritten poster on her board that spelled the word “fail” as the acronym for “First Attempt in Learning”. Up until that point, I never bothered to think about the meaning of the poster because I believed that interpretation was reserved for the more “capable” people in my class.
One day, while seeing the shame in my eyes after another embarrassing mistake, she finally popped the balloon of disappointment I was inflating for myself. “Emma, read to me what the poster on the board says”, she gently told me. I was taken aback because I thought she was going to say something about my inability to do math. “First Attempt in Learning”, I responded. “What does that mean,” she asked. I just looked at the poster, then at her. I had no idea. See, Emma, here is another thing you can not figure out, I told myself. “Emma, the first letter of each word spells the word ‘fail’. When you fail, you are proving to me that you are trying. That is why I have faith in you because I can see that you are learning. I do not want you to ever be discouraged by your failure because it is part of your journey to success,” she explained. Her words could never have hit closer to home. It was as if she took a hold of my doubt-creating machine, threw it out, and replaced it with one that created patience and encouragement.
How could I have been so blind? How did I not see the support in her eyes whenever I messed up? As I reflected upon my previous mistakes, I acknowledged that I had in fact grown as a math student. For instance, the fractions I could not understand last month were something I could handle now. The multiplication facts I struggled so hard to remember long ago were not far from my tongue.
I honestly do not remember what I replied. However one thing is true: from that moment forward, I am never going to let my failures determine who I am; rather, I am going to let them speak of my road to the person who I am meant to be. Although I am still faced with the temptation of clouding my mind with discouragements, I will never forget the meaning of her poster: failure is the first attempt in learning.
Throughout the years, I went back to her words because I am never going to let myself create such a false image of myself ever again. In fact, I can now testify that failing gave me a deeper understanding of things I have never even dreamed of learning, such as multivariable calculus and mechanics.
As my senior year of high school is coming to an end, I know that a new beginning is waiting for me when I start college in the fall. With that said, it is only because of Mrs. Philips that I can confidently testify of my excitement to embark on a new road full of challenges and hardships that will lead to my success. Despite all of the changes I will undergo, I know one thing will stay the same: the beautiful evidence of achievement can only be found in the presence of failure.